A Non-Exhaustive List of Books That Made Me Smarter, Cooler, and Hotter

And let's not forget also far more annoying

I keep a running list in my notes app called “best advice”. I made this list for a couple of reasons. Firstly, a bitch loves a good reminder. Secondly, unsolicited advice is my love language. And thirdly, I don’t wanna sound dumb as fuck when I’m a guest on a podcast and someone asks me, “what’s the best piece of advice you’ve ever received.” Because we all know being put on the spot is the perfect time for your brain to say, “you’re on your own, champ.”

To no one’s surprise, a lot of these nuggets of wisdom have been plucked from some of my favorite books. Because remember, you don’t always have to know or ever even meet your greatest mentors. Reading books written by people far wiser than I’ll ever be is literally my porn. I actually become a worse version of myself every time I read another great book because my self importance sky rockets. And because sharing is caring, I figured I’d dedicate today’s newsletter to some of the greatest books I’ve ever read so we can all be insufferable geniuses together!

Trigger warning: these are all self investment / self improvement books, AKA the opposite of fun for a lot of people. Maybe one day I’ll stop being a masochist and actually dedicate my time to reading books simply for a good time. Probably not. Okay, let’s dive the fuck in shall we?

I broke this down into three categories with only two books per category. I did this for a reason, gente. When I get served these lists, I get so overwhelmed by the cantidad of books people are telling you you need to read—like we get it, you’re literate. Hopefully this method mitigates against that.

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Let’s Get Rich Books:

• I Will Teach You To Be Rich by Ramit Sethi: Talk about a workbook. This book is probably the most un-fun on the list and that’s saying something. That said, it’s incredibly helpful. The author is a personal finance expert and walks you through a 6-week protocol to help get you on the right financial track for you. I’m talking from step-by-step guides on paying off debt and what cards have the lowest fees, to stable investing and more. I love how the concepts are broken down into lessons and buckets that are easy to visually spot and revisit. He’s no bullshit and very straight to the point which is what you need when you’re basically reading a textbook. And while I know I’m making this sound terrible, it’s really not. Financial literacy is invaluable. This book was my introduction to it.

• The Psychology of Money by Morgan Housel: The cover says it all, “timeless lessons on wealth, greed, and happiness.” As much as I love a book like the one listed above, nothing quite seeps into my psyche more than dissecting behaviors. This is the book on money I think everybody should read. The way in which Housel uses stories to unpack such nuanced and complex topics is remarkable. I’m not lying when I tell you I physically could not put this book down—each chapter just got better and better. We can learn and study all of the money “dos” and “don’ts” until we’re blue in the face—none of it matters if you don’t have a grip on why you behave the way that you behave. This book is a fascinating case study of human behavior and I could not recommend it more. It really holds a mirror up to what actually matters the most to you. Plus, it gave me one of my favorite pieces of advice, “good decisions aren’t always rational… at some point you have to choose between being happy and being right.”

Try Not To Be A Loser Books:

• Atomic Habits by James Clear: If you’ve had the misfortune of talking to me in the last 5 months, you’ve absolutely heard me talk about this book. My goal for this year was to get a hold of my fucking habits—the good, the bad, and the stupid. This book was step one of that process. Your identity emerges out of your habits, a harsh truth I refused to acknowledge because I fucking love comfort. But I’d finally had enough and it was time to level up. As the author puts it, “progress requires unlearning… becoming the best version of yourself requires you to continuously edit your beliefs, and to upgrade and expand your identity.” This book has been monumental in building a level of self trust I honestly didn’t know I needed simply because I couldn’t pinpoint that it was self trust that I was lacking in the first place. And while I’m working on implementing the lessons from this book each day, it’s really helped me in falling back into discipline when motivation inevitably wavers. Not to be dramatic (lol), but this book changed my life and I’m so grateful for it.

• Never Split the Difference by Chris Voss: Okay, I’m kind of cheating here because I’m still currently reading this. Then again, it should say something that it made it onto this list. I’m 99% sure my mom was the first person who told me to read this book during a time where I absolutely was not taking her advice. I went as far as purchasing the book but let it sit in my possession for, dare I say, years until I actually picked it up last week. Anyone successful (reductive statement but go with it) giving you advice on how to negotiate will tell you to read this book. The author is a former FBI hostage negotiator and uses real-life hostage stories as explainers. Whether you want a raise, are looking to move up in the world, want to be a better collaborator and/or partner, or are trying to convince your five-year-old out of shoving something up their nose, being a great negotiator is critical. I feel like this is less psychotic cousin to The 48 Laws of Power. As its description says, “this book is a masterclass in influencing others, no matter the circumstances.” It truly gives you the competitive edge but through a unique lens of empathy and intuition.

Don’t Be an Asshole Books — Self-Help Edition:

This category was easily the most difficult to narrow down because… have we met?Listen, I’m going to say this one time and one time only: self help books can be tricky, use your critical thinking skills. Take what resonates, leave the rest.

• The Seven Spiritual Laws of Success by Deepak Chopra: Who doesn’t love a pocketbook with the keys to life? Granted, the first time I read this book I had just taken mushrooms for the first time… but the sentiment remains. This book is fucking awesome. It’s a love letter to the dance we’re in with the Universe / Source / God / whoever that illuminates the law of attraction, and I’ve found it to be the guiding light of my path over the last four years. Whenever I find myself in moments where I need to touch grass, this is the book I reach for. (Which, btw, is why I love it’s short and sweet style). From embracing the law of detachment and the law of least resistance, to remaining grateful for the law of pure potentiality, this book has helped me move through both day to day life as well as some of the most trying moments of my adulthood.

• Sovereign Love by Dené Logan: I included this book for a few reasons. First, I realize this list is incredibly self serving. It’s a whole lot of me, me, and more me. And while we obviously need to do the inner work in order to be better for the collective, I wanted to include a book that is specifically about how we show up in relation to one another. Bare with me as this comes out of my 28-year-old mouth but, it’s really freaking me out the way we talk about relationships these days. Maybe it’s my generation and the ones that come after but I literally feel like Kim when she said, “nobody wants to work these days.” And I’m not talking about career here… I’m saying, the narratives around relationships I hear play out, especially online, focus way too much on what others can do for you without taking any accountability for what you’re potentially bring to the dynamic to keep it shitty. I love how the author explores the concepts of masculine and feminine energies in an effort to help us integrate them so we can stop being so codependent and transactional and lean towards having a mutually balanced and present partnership. I also interviewed Dené on my old podcast :)

Pa Que Sepas

Welcome to “pa que sepas”, the portion of the newsletter where I ramble about cositas (and gente) I think you should know about.

Since we’re already talking about books, I figured I’d clue you into probably my favorite author ever and the genius behind, Bitches Gotta Eat, the one, the only, Samantha Irby.

This woman is quite possibly the funniest person to currently (or ever) exist. If you like shitting your pants stories coupled with trauma makes you funnier stories, she’s the gal for you. Her self deprecating humor isn’t fucking annoying and her essays about her cat actually make me expel noises similar to laughter I wish even I could un-hear.

If you’ve never read her books before, I’m jealous. You get to start from the beginning. But don’t actually… my rec is to start with We’re Never Meeting In Real Life, which is her second book, I believe. Ugh… have the best time ever.

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